Keeping memories alive, especially for our children can help us move toward healing in our grief. Many children share that they are fearful that they will forget their memories with their special person who died. They worry about forgetting some of the little things about their special person like their laugh or how they smell. Some children who are very young may not have any memories but storytelling through anecdotes, watching videos, and looking at photographs of their special person can help them “get to know” their special person and help them feel more connected.
Taking time to talk as a family about special memories each person in the family has with their special person can keep these precious memories fresh in our hearts and minds. Bringing out photo albums, scrapbooks, the special person’s belongings, going through pictures on your phone or computer, and watching home movies can help spark that conversation as well as help the children picture the memories in their minds.
Additionally, writing out stories and memories can help us remember the finest details for years to come. As a family, work on writing a story about your special person that is filled with memories, funny stories, and the little details of your special person that you never want to forget. You may also decide to make a memory box and fill it with your special persons’ favorite things, their scent, clothing items, pictures, music and anything else that would help bring their memory to life. It may be helpful to plan a particular time and place that you and your family will have these “memory moments”. This intentionality of setting aside time can help ensure this takes place in the whirlwind and busyness of life.